my so called life

you know you love me, xoxo

Ahh,Gossip Girl, I really do love you. And now it is time to dissect the reason of why. As well as being wrapped up in the world of Gossip Girl, an inside look into the lives of a group of privileged teenagers that attend an elite NYC private school, I have been equally obsessed with Candace Bushnell. She has been named the philosopher queen of the social scene. Also documenting the details of living in New York, though tending to reach a little farther up when looking for characters, Candace Bushnell is the author behind Sex and the City, Lipstick Jungle, and has just released a new juicy novel that is currently sitting at my bedside, One Fifth.

SO, What is it about these fictional characters, mixed with a heavy dose of current pop culture that I love so much? For starters, Josh Schwartz, the creator of the O.C. (a show I loved) is the one behind converting this young adult novel to a t.v. series, but I think it's more than that. Perhaps it is the lure of Kristen Bell's (Veronica Mars) voice as she narrates the show's storyline, posing as the anonymous blogger herself, Gossip Girl. Maybe it isthe fact that I have been obsessed with the idea of fame and celebrities since I was a child. When by myself, and even with friends, I was constantly acting as if I were on camera, or being interviewed for some important paper. Although, when I think more about it, the lavish display of current fashion, outfits, hair and make-up are probably the biggest draw for me. Half the people I asked about Gossip Girl, after either turning them on to it myself, or discovering that they secretly succumbed to the show's pull on their own, told me that they just thought they were "soooo preeetty". . . Delivered in a dreamy, I wanna look like that, kind of  voice that is usually reserved for speaking of girls in magazines. It's true, Blair Cornelia Waldorf and Serena Celia Van Der Woodsen are both beautiful (real life it-girls Leighton Meester and Blake Lively) and they are the same girls that we see gracing the top ten lists in terms of style. So, it makes sense to me why others like myself might love this show so much. After checking the wikipedia entry on G.G. I see that it's plot line seems to be so much more sticky and high-drama in the television series, which was also what I found to be the case with Bushnell's Lipstick Jungle. This is intentional however, and it is in response to our gossip driven fast pace sex obsessed society. We see reading and television viewing as two totally separate forms of entertainment, and wouldn't watch a show that delivered the same excitement as a book. I also find that wheneverer adapting a book to screen, some of the original story is inevitably changed. In this case I say, it was all for the better, and I am hooked. After viewing all 18 of the first season's episodes, I am now up to the most current events in the lives of these upper east side youngsters. I will be awaiting episode 9's release on the web next Tuesday.

Gossip Girl Season Two can be found on CWTV.com, and Season One can be found on websites such as surfthechannel.com

Also Check out Lipstick Jungle Season One and Season Two on NBC.com, where you can view episodes for free.

waking up scared

femme in charge of camping trip

I am approaching my girlfriend's 32nd birthday, and am in charge of planning the festivities, with some help from our best pal, Erin Singer. These last few days have been a test of truly being able to think of others. You would perhaps assume upon meeting me that I am not the biggest fan of camping,and this simply isn't true. I grew up in California, braving the parks on the weekends for some majorly intense hiking, as wellas setting up some pretty serious camp, more than a couple of times. I have, of course, in my later life adjusted to the comforts of living in the city, attending spas regularly, blow-drying my hair daily, getting dressed up primarily in fancy outfits that gay men would want to steal, watching online television in the comfort of my apartment living room. These are things I have come to love, but this doesn't mean I can't "rough it" for a few days like any butch could.

I think all of this, but in planning the trip, I kept thinking (but not verbalizing)questions like, oh, I wonder if there is a day spa or something near by where we could get facials.  After which I immediately put myself in check and told myself, that's not something everyone would be into. Especially not your girlfriend. Not if the alternative activity is taking a hike or going to the beach. 

I would like to think that I am just as outdoorsy as the next lesbian, but truth be told, even if my upbringing has prepped me for the ability to endure the outdoors, it is just not my cup of tea. So, while I am searching the internet for available camp sites in California, I have to steer myself away from "beach cottages with pools" and "small cabin near resort and spa" which is actually quite difficult. But, all in the name of love, right?

recent inspirations

Went out to a Radar Reading Series event the other night, here in SF. As always I was blown away by who Michelle Tea chooses to have bare their soul for us month after month at the literary events she coordinates. One girl in particular really struck me as being brilliant. Her name is Nicole, and she is from Portland. She has a blog and a v-log, and also puts out several zine's and has published a compilation of her work. She basically writes about her life, which is so inspiring to see. It makes me want to write more, to listen to her advice and just get out there and make the world around me my characters. Go to a coffee shop for three hours or more and just write about something, anything, just do it. I am lacking follow through lately. I really want to be able to take on so much and succeed at it all. But what if I am not capable? Fear often gets in the way. It is my last name after all. Zoe Feahr